snowdusk





Thursday, October 23, 2003

 
終わりじゃない。。。はじまったばかり。。。これは愛のことだと思う。。。

I screwed up big time in my Historical Linguistics mid-term exam. It was all my fault. I had two weeks to prepare for it but I didn't do anything until Saturday this week. It was terribly hard! I was thinking of dropping the course but I needed the credit so I could graduate next year. I've also spent too much money for it already and so I'm just thinking of carrying on with the course. I could have one really bad course, right?

In the meantime, I had a super easy mid-term exam on my Anthropological Linguistics course. It was a 35-item exam, all True or False. I heard all the answers are True except for two. The course sounds like a joke but it's fine with me. I want an easy course to pump up my GPA.

There are so many things I want to say about what I've been going through these days but I just can't put them all here.
5:50 AM

Tuesday, October 14, 2003

 
終わりです。
2:33 AM

Sunday, October 12, 2003

 
Last night was the best karaoke I ever had... and the longest (four hours straight!). Alcohol and karaoke really mix very well!

Last night's event brought me closer to my friends. The best part was singing some of the songs in unison with them. The feelings were so good I could not put them into words. It was unforgettable.
4:18 PM

Friday, October 10, 2003

 
Sometimes I think about things too much and then overanalyzes them. I realize that I leave lots of room for misunderstanding when I do this.

I just had a very nice conversation with a friend over the phone and he made me feel so much better. Thank you so much. You know who you are :-)
2:15 PM

Thursday, October 09, 2003

 
そう、好きだ。

... but it means nothing to you.

**かっこいいって。**

本当?

... jasmine incense, suspended, filling my room the most beautiful scent.

... do you think about me?

... pride.
1:43 PM

 
I watched Grave of the Fireflies. It was a very sad movie.

It was a very stressful day for me. After my classes finished, I walked from my university to home. I wanted to think about what has been happening in my life recently. I thought of how I let myself be hurt by others. I thought about the loneliness and the heartache that I've been going through. I cried a bit as I was walking.

I stopped by a coffeeshop on my way home, had a cup of coffee and read my book.

I got up after finishing my coffee and started walking again. I made a promise to myself that I will be stronger.
1:15 PM

Sunday, October 05, 2003

 
超電磁マシーン ボルテス・ファイブ !!!懐かしいなあ〜。。。
5:24 PM

 
life's a bitch.
3:28 PM

 
I got so pissed off with this lady working in the library cafeteria so I sent an e-mail to the manager:

I would like to complain about the treatment I received when I dined at the Robarts Library cafeteria on Saturday, October 9 just after noon. I bought a slice of pizza and a 591 mL Coke. As I went to the cashier to pay, I was received by a very rude unwelcoming cashier. She gave me a very bad look and a sigh and told me that she didn't have change for $20. So I gave her my $5, and then she addressed me with "Hey!", and pointed at the cash machine that the total was $5.62. So I gave her back the $20 and then she complained again that she didn't have change. I told her that that's the only one I got. She then opened the cash and I saw many 10 bills and change, and so I told her "what do you mean you don't have change, you got lots of change", and then she mumbled something and I didn't understand. I then told her twice "you coul've said it nicely". She should've asked me in a nice professional way for example, "Sorry I don't have change for $20" and I coul've avoided writing this complaint. She was so rude and she should not address customers in such a way. I wonder if she does it to everyone else. I may be a student and she probably thought we can be treated like that, well, she's very mistaken. I want you to give me a feedback on this. The cashier is a short lady. She's Hispanic with a strong accent.

2:12 AM

Saturday, October 04, 2003

 
I feel such a geek spending my Friday night in the library doing my homework. I guess I'm both a bit upset about something and at the same time stressed out with the load of school work I have at hand. I've had some friends asked me to go out and have fun, well d'oh--it's Friday night!, but I decided to spend some time alone and torture myself with books and all those nice school stuff... I asked one person, yes, one person who I really care about, to see me and just spend just a little bit of time with me and I got turned down. It hurts but I told myself to be strong.... I could've gone out with my other friends.

I have thought about the whole situation and I thought maybe I'll stop whining about it and face the reality. I will be single forever. In fact, I've always been single anyway. Sometimes I thought what's the use of having a special someone. All it does to me is give me heartache.

I guess I just haven't found the right person for me. I should not get myself involved into something that is a one-way love affair. I think I am not getting the affection that I've been longing for from someone. All I do is give my love at the fullest meanwhile I don't get back the love that I deserve. I think I deserve it and I will get it from somebody who willingly gives it to me.
8:46 AM



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