snowdusk

blog

What's happening

2020-08-29 14:50:00 +0000
#personal

I have been very discouraged about pretty much everything lately. I am losing motivation in everything I used to enjoy doing. Sad news on social media, finding out who your real friends are, copycats, people thinking that the copycats are original, me hearing people say that myself and the group I am associated with are copycats (while I definitely am not), people with double standards, me always making the wrong turns/decisions in life, wasting my energy for nothing... to name just a few of my dilemma -- all seem to make matters worse and they all make me sick.

I have been thinking of taking my Tilderadio show on hiatus... but at the same time I fear that this action might just add to my misery. So I have been contemplating on it with 50/50 chance of happening. I will keep sleeping on it.

I have set my Mastodon to block the entire mastodon.sdf.org instance. I'm sorry if you belong to this instance. I have no rational explanation why I decided to block this domain other than I hate the admins and members with some kind of 'authority' on this instance. I will also stop listening to my favourite anonradio shows. I feel terrible for making this decision since I have friends who still stream their shows on anonradio but I cannot have double standards. My disgust for SDF/anonradio will remain in place. I will focus my full attention to Tilderadio and the Tildeverse moving forward... will try my best anyway once my old motivation is back.

You don't like my drama? Too bad. This is who I am. You either like me or not... and I am not forcing anyone to like me, the things I do and like. I am not aiming for popularity. I just want to do what I like doing and entertain/interact with people who enjoy them. If you can accept me the way I am then you are a true friend.